The snowmageddon and roof damage is taking a toll... nightmares, etc [View all]
https://www.democraticunderground.com/10181785030
(For background info)
The 20+ feet of snow everywhere has already got my Seasonal Depression going nuts. I can't tell you how bad I want grass and DIRT in the yard again! I already have issues with winter and have been trying to get over that for years...
NOW add a snowpack in my yard that baffles the mind, and with NO end in sight or concept as to how long it's gonna take to MELT.
Last week, the worst happened, something finally broke through the roof and the ceiling of the kitchen bubbled and broke through. I STILL havent been able to get someone over here to shovel it off. (One estimate was over $5K!)
Now my stomach has been on the fritz for days, and I'm having multiple nightmares a night, waking in a sweat or in massive pain in my joints.
Last night I had a full sleep-paralysis phenomenon with someone in my bed holding me and unable to breathe or speak.
Yes, I have tools to use for these things. Yes, I have anti-anxiety meds from when my mom dies last year, but I don't know if they are worse for sleep stuff. Yes, I know eventually things will work out ...
But I just needed to vent and cry and be told I'm ok.
(On top of this my daughter moved across country and decided to stop talking to me after telling me via text that I was a horrible parent, etc. My other kid is in crisis living in CO and he KNOWS I can't help him and he's gotta "adult" his way out of it... Both kids are just fine when I can "help" them or give them money....but when I can't it's "you suck" so I am having to distance myself from THAT damaging relationship.
My daughter trashed the family cabin and my sister is now in charge of the family estate since dad's in memory care...and our relationship is strained at best....so I'm worried my daughter's actions are gonna fuck up THAT relationship.)