No One Sure Why Kristi Noem Wearing Firefighter Helmet, Night-Vision Goggles, High Heels, Wet Suit

[sheshe2]

No One Sure Why Kristi Noem Wearing Firefighter Helmet, Night-Vision Goggles, High Heels, Wet Suit

WASHINGTON—Racking their brains as they tried to determine the express purpose of the homeland security secretary’s outfit, sources confirmed Monday they were not sure why Kristi Noem was wearing a firefighter helmet, night-vision goggles, high heels, and a wet suit. “Huh, that’s odd, but there must be some kind of reason for it, right?” said one of the sources, who frowned as they took in the sight of the overdressed DHS chief adjusting the quiver of arrows she wore over her back. “We’re in a conference room, but maybe she’s going somewhere afterwards? But where exactly would that be? I don’t remember any of the previous homeland security secretaries wearing that, but maybe I just wasn’t paying attention?” At press time, Noem was reportedly putting on a ghillie suit.

-The Onion

https://theonion.com/no-one-sure-why-kristi-noem-wearing-firefighter-helmet-night-vision-goggles-high-heels-wet-suit/

[Irish_Dem]

1. Some customers request specific outfits.

[sheshe2]

4. **snicker**

[Irish_Dem]

6. I think you make more money if you dress up in costumes?

[sheshe2]

9. I have heard that said.

[Irish_Dem]

11. IceBarbie's botox is not cheap, she needs top dollar.

[sheshe2]

13. Well, at one of the Senate committee hearings...

It was said she will have blown through her DHS budget by July, 2 months before the next one is granted. It was also said that she has not filed an accounting for her expenditures. I wonder if we are not only paying for her costumes but her Botox as well.🤔

[Irish_Dem]

16. I am certain we are paying for all of it.

The hair extensions, botox, make up, plastic surgery, costumes, designer outfits,
make up artist, clothing stylist, photographer, personal guards, etc.

Turning tricks just brings in a bit more cash.

[Cha]

2. Cosplay Treasonous Asshole is Why.

Fry in Hell,,,noem

[dutch777]

3. I think you need a brighter shade of red lipstick to pull off that ensemble. Maybe some glitter dust too. Amateurs!

[jls4561]

5. Reminds me of the Borg. But then, many Rethugs do. How else to explain Stephen Miller?

[hlthe2b]

7. How many of us were absolutely PRAYING this was the Onion and could not scroll down quickly enough

to be sure...

[sheshe2]

12. IKR?

So very hard to tell these days.

[Kaleva]

15. That's what I did.

[allegorical oracle]

8. You must wear heels with a wet suit. Swim fins make your legs look stubby. And

must add that this woman must have one crazy mess of a closet.

[UTUSN]

10. Kink

[usonian]

14. Shops at Victoria's Stable Diffusion.

AI Caramba.

[Brainfodder]

17. Kristi "Camera Ready" Noem

Weird.